Veterinarian, lecturer, radio personality, and Idahoan-by-way-of-Texas (and other places) Dr. Madison Seamans shares a wonderful collection of stories from over 30 years in an equine veterinary practice and a lifetime of working with horses and their ever-surprising barnmates. Through ready humor and with a keen eye for calling out the particular peculiarities of horse people and horses alike, Dr. Seamans aims to teach readers how to be with and care for horses, promoting the health and happiness of all with lessons laced in laughter. Entertaining and educational by turns, this unique memoir is for anyone who loves animals (and some who just don't know it yet).
Dr. Seamans' tales, both small and tall, are grouped in horse-centric categories and well-stocked with essential information delivered in a creative and highly enjoyable way. The reader climbs into the truck alongside the doc and drives off to aid horses with wounds, stomach aches, allergies, and bizarre behaviors, as well as those in severe physical distress. Quite by accident, you'll find yourself familiar with and understanding common equine medical problems and how they are diagnosed and treated, all while marveling at the remarkable situations a country veterinarian can find himself in. Playful yet serious, honest yet tongue-in-cheek, this wonderfully written book is an up-close look at a well-lived rural life that is about as authentic as America gets. No one who cares a whit for the animal kingdom, and the humans who dare enter it, will be disappointed.
Foreword |
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xiii | |
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Preface |
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xix | |
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1 | (18) |
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3 | (3) |
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6 | (1) |
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7 | (1) |
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The Last Great Snowball Fight in College Station, Texas |
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8 | (5) |
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13 | (1) |
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Prison and the Belligerent Cow |
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14 | (3) |
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17 | (2) |
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19 | (44) |
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"A Good Vet Could Fix This" |
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21 | (4) |
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25 | (3) |
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Delbert, the Cow Shoes, and the King Ranch |
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28 | (6) |
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34 | (4) |
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38 | (7) |
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45 | (3) |
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Nails---Some Hot, and Some "Not" |
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48 | (4) |
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52 | (3) |
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55 | (8) |
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63 | (26) |
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65 | (7) |
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72 | (8) |
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"Is He Ill, or Just Napping?" |
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80 | (5) |
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"How Old Is a Baby Horse When He Opens His Eyes?" |
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85 | (4) |
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89 | (32) |
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A Belly Ache and a Trailer Ride |
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91 | (4) |
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Colic, Calcium, and Client Loyalty |
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95 | (5) |
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100 | (4) |
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104 | (6) |
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110 | (3) |
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113 | (8) |
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Chapter 5 The Nervous System Makes Me Nervous |
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121 | (66) |
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Adventures in Field Anesthesia |
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123 | (8) |
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131 | (4) |
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135 | (8) |
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143 | (5) |
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Equine Herpes---No Shame Here |
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148 | (7) |
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155 | (3) |
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Buddy and the Picnic Table |
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158 | (4) |
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How to Breed a Mare... with a Paralyzed Stallion |
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162 | (5) |
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167 | (7) |
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174 | (3) |
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177 | (3) |
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180 | (7) |
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Chapter 6 Boys and Girls Will Get Together |
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187 | (24) |
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189 | (4) |
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Mares and Pregnancy: Timing, Hormones, and Little Luck |
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193 | (3) |
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196 | (3) |
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199 | (4) |
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The Traveling Pregnant Mare |
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203 | (4) |
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207 | (4) |
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Chapter 7 Neoplasia, There's no Nice Word for Cancer |
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211 | (22) |
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213 | (4) |
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Ed, "Mom," and Intestinal Cancer |
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217 | (10) |
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Gender Confusion and Ovarian Cancer |
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227 | (6) |
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Chapter 8 Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction |
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233 | (56) |
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235 | (4) |
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Buddy and the "Beach Camper" |
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239 | (3) |
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Dancer and Her "Fly Allergy" |
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242 | (7) |
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249 | (5) |
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Milkmaids, Spoiled Wine, and Dead Chickens |
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254 | (4) |
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"She's Really Not My Horse" |
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258 | (7) |
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Strangles, Stress, and Pigeon Fever Panic |
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265 | (4) |
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269 | (6) |
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Horse Humor and Intelligence |
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275 | (6) |
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Training, Tendonitis, and a Tree-Climbing Toyota |
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281 | (8) |
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289 | (32) |
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291 | (4) |
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295 | (9) |
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304 | (7) |
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311 | (4) |
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Never Trust a Sneaky Pony |
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315 | (6) |
Acknowledgments |
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321 | |
Dr. Madison Seamans is an equine veterinarian in practice for 35 years in Texas, Kentucky, California, Idaho, and New Mexico. He now lives in Capitan, New Mexico, with his beautiful wife Annette, two really good horses, two Jack Russell Terrorists (not misspelled!), and an undisclosed number of barn cats. They just keep showing up, he says, and you can't just give 'em a good meal and send 'em on their way. Dr. Seamans rode bronc horses till his brains came inwhen he decided college was easier than shoeing horses and cowboyin'. This turned out to be a misconception, as college was very difficult. But he squeezed his four years into twelve, finally finishing his veterinary degree in 1985 at Texas A&M University. He earned a master's degree at the University of Florida where he studied the equine immune system. Later he did postdoctoral research and was a teaching resident at the University of California, Davis, College of Veterinary Medicine. He is a talented speaker and humorist, a regionally published author, a marginal artist, and a bad poet. Besides his equine practice and a strong interest in podiatry and equine behavior, Dr. Seamans' spare time is spent riding his horses, as well as expressing gratitude that he married a good trainer.